My Philo 10 in a Nutshell

By Rhena Mae Abundo

Like most of my classmates, I embarked on this Philosophy 10 ride with Sir Bernard Caslib based on recommendations from friends who were previously his students. They had nothing but praises for him and told me how much they have learned from his class so I followed their advice and enlisted for it. Truth be told, I had lots of expectations. First, it’s because of the profusely good things I have heard about this professor who will handle our class, and second, because I recently developed a love affair with Western thinkers since I took Social Science II with Ms. Hernandez. During the course of the subject, I always had a headache after class. But it was the good kind, I tell you. Every after Philo, my head swirls with questions I never imagined I’ll be interested in finding the answers to. Until now, I am still intrigued with Descartes, Hume and Mill. I mean, where they dug up all the questions they had and how they even managed to sustain the patience in making sense of all their questions that have seemingly unfathomable answers is beyond my comprehension. There are times when I am so amazed by these people—even the collective group from whose minds sprang forth the different schools of thought trying to define what the meaning of life is. Sometimes, the reasoning seemed absurd, at first, but once all foundations have been laid out in front of you, it just all makes sense, like a puzzle coming together. In terms of the academic gain, I will walk out of this class with head held high, confident that I am a wee bit more cultured, a wee bit more equipped in the off chance of engaging into random conversations about ethics or the philosophy of love and sex with a friend or a stranger.

During class, I am more of the spectator. I become tongue-tied—too overwhelmed of it all. In my head, I commend my quick-witted classmates who always have insights about the topic, and very much grateful for them too for saving the rest of the class from awkward silence. I am glad that I became part of this class, so clingy and sabaw together. We are such a diverse group and yet we blended well. We are also an amazingly talented bunch! Okay, it’s really just them. But once I participated in all those class shiz, I was surprised myself of what I can [swallow to] do. Fun times.

And then there’s Sir Caslib—the most fun of all, the most thoughtful as he always ask us how our weekend has been, one with the most celebrity sightings, the Benjo-Mari matchmaker, one to give wonderful readings (!), one who’s not afraid to ask us the questions and help us birth the right answers. Because of him, this Philo class had been what I expected and more.

The Double Life

Finally! I've put my hands on the keyboard to actually type something for ze blog and break my two-month silence! First off, let me wish you a Happy 2013! It's February, I know, but this is technically my first post for the year so forgive me for my long-overdue greeting.

Well, how was your January? Mine had been really optimistic, as it always is when something starts. Academic duties came flowing in the very day classes resumed and are still on the roll. Since that time, I had a total of 8 experiments, 4 exams, 2 results-and-discussion reports, a practical exam, and a plant visit. Jobfair 2013, a major undertaking for the semester, had also been successfully pulled off. It was a busy month [hence, my blogging hiatus] but the thing about schoolwork, or any work for that matter, is that by the end of it, if you know you have exhausted all possibilities, what remains is gratitude--that it is finally over and, hopefully, that the outcome is what you want it to be. Right now, I'm having a relatively light week after that first wave of storm and so I try to write every incoherent thought I got before time catches up with me.

For my alternate life [pertaining to the non-academic one], the first week was spent on books and with my sister. We arrived in Manila on the 2nd of January [it's only the second time I flew!] and classes didn't start until the 7th, which means I got five days for myself. In that span of time, I finished reading Hemingway's A Moveable Feast and made considerable progress with Hugo's Les Miserables. But that was it. Once my attention-seeker subjects clamored for my time, I was left with my poor time management skills and the untouched pages of my books. Have I told you that I have classes from Monday to Saturday? That leaves me Sunday which, instead of being devoted to reading, becomes my opportunity of catching up on missed episodes of Modern Family, Once Upon A Time, Downton Abbey, Girls, and Suits. Since it is Oscars season, I also try to watch all films nominated for Best Picture [If I'm not mistaken, there are nine of them and I still got Lincoln left.] 

February in a New Fashion

Boom! I realized I didn't write anything about the summary of my February. Since it's almost halfway of March already, I really see no point of writing one anymore. But then again I remembered how great that month was for me and so, yes, endure this post! *evil laugh*

Normally, I dread February. For the past three years of my college life, all emotional and mental stresses are concentrated on this particular month because the sem is neither near the start nor it is near the ending. Exams and requirements pile up and so many things have to be done in so little time. In short, February is my breaking point. Despite all these, I managed because of happy things to look forward to such as Feb 8 which is our anniversary. There's also Valentine's, although I think it's just purely a capitalist idea. This year's February is no different--maybe what changed was how I viewed it. And yes, positivity is the key! I still cried every once in a while because of all the academic pressure (programming! yes, you got that right! plus poor grades. ugh.) but I bounced back faster this time. I still ask why I am in Chem Eng'g but at least now, I have accepted the fact that there's no other way but to learn to love this course and finish it till the last! Heck, I'm in my fourth year now!

I also got by this month with prayers, family, friends and, of course, Bennard. There had been more random bondings with the girls. Mama and Papa learned so many things about cellphone usage which means they called and texted a lot now than before. Bennard introduced me to more distractions to my loneliness (thus, more distractions to my acads as well! HAHA Kidding. I do time management 'noh! Charot.) such as good TV series, films, and books. And most importantly, I faced my fears and studied more. And it really paid off! I was so happy with my exam results in ChE 126 and MBB1. ChE 123 and PI 100 were good enough, but still can do better. ChE 131, that one was a problematic subject, until recently when I got my LE2 papers back and learned that I topped the class. Let's say it was a pivotal point that made me realize... "Perhaps I cannot think of any other course to shift into because I am already in the right one."

Cheers to my most stable February in four years!

Secret to Happiness

It's been over a month since I last posted! And now that I will soon have to say bye-bye to my fast internet connection (I'm transferring to dorm from bhaus so that means hello mabagal na Dilnet!), I might as well blog again. 

Well, what has been going on? Hmm, lemme see. The second semester started last week and I have already met with all of my new professors. Instincts tell me this is going to be one tough time in my life but I am ready to face it since I have also started confiding with the Lord since Nov 5th. I have been praying St. Bridget's prayer: The Fifteen Prayers Secret to Happiness for almost two weeks now and it feels so comforting despite the somewhat bleak future ahead. I have noticed good changes in myself since I started praying and it does make me really happy.

During the first day, I found myself praying for my sins, my worries, and my cares as if I have perfect knowledge of them all. In the past, I would just stare blankly at the wall, lost in thought what I am about to say to Him. On the second day, I was placed in a situation where I would normally be annoyed to my landlady because she plans to transfer my bed to the top bunk because according to her, the bottom bunk already belongs to my roommate who just arrived this second semester. I was tempted to ignore my new roommate because I feel like she's part of this "injustice." But then after I prayed, I just smiled at her and we started talking. That night--and until now--she remains at the top bunk. Maybe she convinced our landlady not to transfer her bed anymore. Who knows? That same day, I also learned that I wasn't accepted in the dorm. It felt like I just calmly accepted all of it. I wasn't mad at OSH at all. The third day was just a happy day. It was Bennard's 20th birthday and we truly enjoyed our every moment together. On the fourth day, I almost had a quarrel with Bennard. I was being the selfish person that I am again and he pointed this out to me. Because I got offended, I was tempted to do the thing I always do: escape and flee. But then for some reason, maybe Bennard's patience or some clarity I later had in my head, I didn't. We separated ways that night in good terms. On the fifth day, I learned that a new list of accepted dormers will be posted the next day at the OSH, and I am feeling lucky! Indeed, the next day, I was accepted--and there's a twist! While I was expecting Sampa or Kamia as my new dorm (I checked non-single fee dorm thinking there would be greater chances of being accepted in there), I got admitted to Ilang-Ilang (a single-fee dorm which means my food for weekdays is already provided for!) And my happiness for the sixth day does not yet end in that--I was able to add another subject: MBB1, making me 18 units this sem, and change the schedule for my ChE 131 to my desired date and time! Weeeee, Mae and I are classmates again! :-) 

This joy I am currently experiencing means a great deal for me. I wasn't being my usual self the past sem and I so much wanted to change that this time. I want to stop worrying about the simplest things. I want to avoid getting too down at the slightest circumstances. I want to live happily and worry-free. I know life will throw shit at me, but I want to know that I will be able to bounce back gracefully from that. Now, I found the secret weapon--lots of prayers and of course, my wonderful support system. With all these, I feel happier and less inclined to succumbing to my depressing thoughts again. I still may not have gotten rid of my worldly desires but I know I am beginning to learn to control. You know, the other day, I was craving for Shakey's buffalo wings and I was aware it will leave a gaping hole in my wallet in case I gave in, but then I thought of heating the meat I brought from home. And voila, I was satisfied! Good save, right?

I hope everyone's as happy as I am. :-)